What the hell is going on?

Today is a sunny day in London, everybody is enjoying themselves in their garden, in their homes and I am just walking along the river Thames getting some fresh air and wasting time.

All of a sudden a big black van stops, a door opens and someone grabs me and drags me into the van. I am terrified and don’t know what is happening. I want to scream but someone is stuffing my mouth with something and put tape over my mouth while someone else is holding me. My hands and my feet are tied next. A blindfold is put over my eyes. What is happening? Why is this happening to me? Where are they taking me? I am so so so scared.

After a while, the van stops. I hear the door open. I smell grass, trees, flowers. Where the fuck am I? What do they want? Someone speaks but I can’t hear it. I am carried somewhere. I feel them going downstairs. I am getting even more scared. What the fuck is this? I hear a door opened, they put me on the floor. A door is closed. There is no noise around. What do they want with me? I can’t move, I can’t see.

Someone is lifting me up. My hands are now free, so are my feet but I still can’t see. I am held firmly though so I still can’t move.

And then…

And then…

And then…

Someone opens my shirt and put their hands in my bra, lifting my breasts out of the bra, pulls my nipples hard. The hands go down and unzip my skirt, it falls on the floor. My tights and panties are also removed. I seem to recognise those hands. I seem to recognise the smell of the person in front of me. But I won’t say his name. I think I now know. I am no longer scared, I know. It’s him. I’m safe, it’s him.

I am no longer held, he removes my shirt, he removes my bra. But I still can’t see. I feel his hands going from my neck, along my shoulders, down my arms, taking my hands, coaching me to walk forward. I walk forward until I touch the wall. He turns me around. What is he doing? I must trust him, he’s not going to hurt me. He always said he would never hurt me. But what is he doing?

“Maria”

My hands are restrained again above my head.

“Maria! Wake up!”

Oh no, I was having such a nice dream.