Today was another one of my emotional rollercoaster: despair, comfort, joy, hurt, pleasure, heartache and feeling of low worth (I am not good enough).
I have finished processing one of the things that needed processing and can now move on. I will take that as a lesson that when things don’t feel right, then there is a reason. It means time to talk.
I have gained a supporter in my fight for freedom in the shape of a lady I knew when she was a child. She is giving me the same advice as my ex-Dom. She’s very strong and positive. I like her a lot. I will turn to her if I go bonkers because of the pain I go through.
Talking about being bonkers, I have gone through so much pain the past month that I am surprised I haven’t gone overboard. It feels like the more pain you have, the more pain you can take. It makes you cry yes but you also end up that much stronger.
I am now back to reasonable normality. I am very tired but serene.
I have applied for over 20 jobs today so I think I am happy with that.
I’m going to a Munch tomorrow (only very shortly) to have a breather from it all. It will do me good to have some adult time.
I am positive and looking forward to tomorrow.
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